On the subject of maturity
Many many years ago I recall saying, well perhaps whining, to my wise aunt that I was getting old. The way I put it, it must have sounded as if I was the only person who was getting older. At that time I was likely in my 30’s and she was well into her 50’s. My aunt looked me straight in the eye and said “We all age at the same rate-one day at a time.” That phrase has never left me. It makes a lot of sense. Get over it- neither you or I are not getting older any slower or faster than anyone else on this earth. We are all moving along the aging scale at the very same pace. It is my experience that aging can be more or less a big deal depending on how old you are and your views of aging.
If life is viewed in terms of a baseball game then you make your way around the four bases during your lifetime. Since the average lifespan for women in our country is around 80 years, then each base represents 20 years. Using this analogy, I’m be leaving third base on my way to home plate. To be clear, I am just leaving…maybe my foot is still on the base and I will do whatever I can to make it a and healthy trip to home plate and when I get there I want to go like a watch battery. I’m ok with that. There are many who never had opportunity to make way around the bases in the 20 year segments.
The accounts of aging can be depressing, insightful, refreshing and witty. Last week I attended a show that included readings from the book I Feel Great About My Hands . The editor Shari Graydon was present along with several of the contributors. The contributors have all waived their claim royalties and proceeds of the book go to Media Action.
The contributors who were present included Alison Smith, CBC one news, Susan Harada formerly with CBC, Lynn Miles, singer/song writer and several other interesting and accomplished women who have lived lives as farmers, poets and/professors. From my perspective and being of a certain age, the evening was outstanding.
Shari chaired the evening and told how she was paying homage to Nora Ephron’s and her book of similar title, I Feel Bad About My Neck. There is one coincidence (wouldn’t you know that was the title of my last blog) I am not particularly pleased with…and that is my sometimes stated goal of learning to drive a long haul semi and one of the short stories “How Drooping Breasts Led Me to a Truck-driving Life of Adventure” . I’d like to think the author and I don’t have everything in common. But then again, the whole thing may go with growing older and if you asked the girls, they might just say- we all age at the same rate….one day at a time.
Are thoughts and the insights and wisdom of aging are similar for men and women? (aside from the drooping breasts…but then again that might be a thought shared more commonly than one would realize)
If I had the skill, I would write plain language instruction for many things one tries to do on the computer. Yes indeed, there are instructions and tutorials and videos. However, they sometimes lack in their helpfulness when things don’t work. Take figuring out to hyperlink into a blog. I read the instructions (not a routine practice for me), I watched tutorials, I copied, pasted, cursed, tried again. What isn’t available under instructions routinely is ” and if this doesn’t work then”. Finally I sought some assistance. Yes I did this. Yes I did that. I deleted this http://. What ? I should have deleted that http:// ? Why? That doesn’t make sense. Technology!
Let me know if the links work this time!
5 thoughts on “We all age at the same rate”
As I approach 35 in a few weeks, this comes in a timely manner. I suppose your aunt was more wise than even she knew.
Also, I really want you to write that book about the droopy breasts and truck driving. It would be glorious.
It’s great to hear my aunt’s wisdom was helpful. The encouragement to write the book is appreciated. I will take it under advisement.
Your Aunt was correct as far as the calendar goes but what she didn’t factor in is that we woman are aging in an ageist as well as a sexist society. Thus you are complemented when someone tells you that you don’t look your age. You assume they mean you look younger rather than you look older (maybe wiser?). I hope media watch with the book donation focuses on ageist portrayals.
Chinese people always value age so I guess Chinese women ages at how old they look plus 10. Works every time. they are pleased. Go figure.
“Aging” doesn’t necessarily mean old but it means passing another milestone. First kid starts school. Last kid leaves school, first Grand kid (I am STILL waiting), retirement etc. Each time we say “I am getting old” but that is not really what we mean. We look back and realize we have seen a lot of life and many things have happened. We start out as us, then we become our parents, then we become our grandparents and we wonder where “us” went to and how did we get here?.
We are still here…just layered, as you note, in the robes of experience.