Well, here I am into day three of what I was told would be a fun vacation for me while my owners were away. You’ll have a great time Squidge, they said. Oh yeah, if they only knew what it was like. That leads me to the title of this blog. I don’t want to overreact but if someone out there in the blogosphere has a 1-800 number or an email address for a Puppy Helpline, please send it to me. I’d like to be in touch with an unbiased but knowledgeable third party. It’s about how I am being treated. They make me go for walks when I want to stay inside. I’ve already told you that but today, in addition to that grievance, I have another one.
It’s about the food and the absolute unfairness of the situation. I like the food, mind you. It’s some sort of new dog food and I can’t wait to be fed and to eat up every last bit. The thing is, I want more when my bowl is empty. And they won’t give me more. And then to add insult to injury the human eats in front of me when she’s “hungry” . Well, not exactly in front but up high, well above me, and she tries to hide the fact she’s eating but I can smell it. I do my best to make her feel guilty by sitting at her feet and looking up at her with a slightly mournful expression. It’s all fine to be a human and go over to the cupboard and pick out something to eat anytime you want but quite another thing to be a dog and be at the mercy of that human who is free to eat whenever she wants. Not fair.
There have been communications back and forth about this new dog food and how much I am to receive in a day. They are giving me amount recommended for a 10 lb dog but since I heard that I’ve been thinking I know where the problem lies. I am not 10 lbs, I am sure I weigh at least 20 lbs. and so my ration should be increased. And that’s why I want the 1-800 number as I ‘m sure someone there will come to my aid. Can anyone help?
On the bright side, the human members of this household have exposed me to a new cultural experience. At my regular home I watch TV that 30 somethings like to watch. Here the crowd is up more in years and they don’t act the same. They get into their pyjamas at 9pm (sometimes earlier!) and they watch public television. I am now watching the mystery series Poirot every evening before I go to bed. I think we will make it through a whole season before I go home. He’s a dapper character, Poirot and I’m sure he’d be my friend if I were to meet him. There are no dogs in the show so far but if a dog appears I am going to watch to see how much they are fed.
It’s hard to put on a smiley face in these conditions but I do my best.